The red lining of stitches felt like trouble to Josh. He was holding his mitt and ball and, in the seat, next to him was his bag full of his uniform and bat. Next to that was his younger sister, Alice who was only three years old.
It was tryouts for the little league baseball team. Josh was nervous and the pressure from his father wasn't giving him confidence. Josh's mother had passed away when giving birth to Alice, so it was just his father. Josh needed to get into baseball otherwise, he would have to drive Josh and Alice at the exact same time in opposite directions if Josh didn't get into the baseball team with the older kids rather than the younger. If he did good and got in with the older kids and all his friends, Alice and Josh's sports would be at unconventional times so that their father can drop off one and then right after drop off the other.
Josh looked out the window for the eleventh time that ride. Even though he had seen so many different buildings and people, all he could remember was brown and green. He didn't know why he was so worried. All his friends would be there and his favorite coach too. It just felt different this time.
Finally, they arrived at the field. Josh saw his friends huddled up in the corner, smiling ear to ear. They knew they would succeed while Josh was still unsure. His hearing was muffled, his hand was all sweaty, there was a marking on the old car seat. The music became crickets.
"Joshua? Come on now, we're late enough." Josh slowly looked out the window and saw his father rush him along. He clicked the button and pushed out the door. It was a sweltering summer day, and his thick, white pants didn't really help with the heat.
"You got this Josh!" Alice came running around the car and gave Josh a warm hug.
"Thanks Alice." He should've been happy while thanking her sister. His father had said several times before that a sibling will always be there for them no matter what.
"Josh, come on!" His friends were waving him over and yelling at him to hurry up. Josh slowly walked over while the parents and children waited near the sidelines.
"Hey guys." Was the first thing Josh had said since quiet some time. "Ready for tryouts?"
"Yeah, of course!" Tommy had said. It was the four of them, Josh, Oliver, Jake, and Tommy.
"How come your so worried, Josh?" Jake was often really well at seeing how someone was feeling but all three could figure he was distressed.
"Just nervous, that's all." They took no notice of Josh's attention to how badly he wanted to get in the car and get home.
***
"Nice job on warm up boys! We will now begin the tryouts!" The coach, the one Josh didn't know, was very loud.
"Here's how it works, you will play a normal game, and we'll see how you throw, swing, catch, and run, Understand?"
"Yes, Coach Walker!" The team yelled. Josh grabbed another sunflower seed from his back pocket and spit it on the brown dirt. The bag was almost empty, not knowing how many he chewed on.
Coach Smith and Walker made two teams. All three of them, Josh, Oliver, and Tommy were on one, while Jake was on the other. Josh's team was batting to start the game and some boy that looked like he could be sixteen was swinging first. Of course, no strikes, and almost a home run.
Josh had lots of time, he was at the far end of the batting line, so he asked around if anyone had anymore sunflower seeds. No one had any, or just they didn't want to give theirs away. Because he had time, he walked around to the parent's side and asked his father if he had anything eat or focus on.
"Joshua, what are you doing? You know you're not supposed to be back here!"
"Hello to you too." Josh had muttered. "Hey dad, did you bring extra sunflower seeds?"
"You already finished those?"
Josh fell silent. The only noise he could hear was the crack of the ball and the cheering of many parents. The hissing of the baseball was close. Really close. Josh, who was looking at the dark dirt in shame, spun around and saw the ball in just the corner of his eye. He reached his hand out of his pocket and caught the ball.
Josh didn't know what he was doing. It sort of just happened. He threw the ball back to the pitcher as if nothing happened, but eyes were still laid on him. And he was happy to admit that the coaches were too.
"So do you have any more?" Josh faced his father again.
Just like Josh, he acted as if nothing had happened, "You promise not to eat these in one go?" His father was holding up a red, white, and blue bag. It was just like the American flag.
Josh remembered the Fourth of July. He was seven years old when his mother had been carrying his younger sister. He remembered the joy on his face when he realized he was going to be an older brother. He had sat in between his loving parents while watching the spark and flash of purple, red, and questioned how fireworks really worked. Just a month later, he noticed that Josh could never enjoy July's the same way because his mother was no longer there to enjoy it with him.
"Yeah, I promise." Josh said. He took the bag and walked away.
***
About an hour later, Josh was three people away from the bat. He had many seeds left in the bag and wished he hadn't eaten so many. He felt sick, tired, and missed his couch where he could just watch cartoons all day long and not have a care in the world because he was only ten.
He was two people away from the bat now and they hadn't got a single out. Then something happened. And it wasn't a ball hurling at his face again. He looked around and it was like time had slowed. He stood up with a ringing sound in his ear. He looked at his teammates next to him. They were having a ball while throwing seeds at each other, but the seeds were stuck in the air. Josh had never seen anything like this other than in his cartoons.
'His cartoons...' He thought. 'They always ending in it being in a dream...'
"Josh?" Someone had said faintly. "Josh? Come on, your up!"
Without thinking, Josh stood up walked over to the base. The sun breathed on his eyes and slightly woke him up. The sunflower seeds were alive in his stomach. He picked up the bat and wondered why, why, why, did baseball players have to wear thick, white pants in the middle of July heat.
He picked up the bat and realized that it was the fourth on Friday. He went back to his memory, the green and yellow of the sparks and the champagne glasses clicked between many mothers. The beer bottles clustering near the porch door.
"Strike!" Josh had completely missed the ball. He was so into his thought that he didn't even see it go by.
He had an idea. He would hit the ball as if Friday had came early and all those fireworks were really just the ball coming at him.
Josh put the bat right up behind his shoulders and started to panic. His slick hands weren't immensely helpful with the wooden bat. He could get a splinter. And all of a sudden, it happened again.
The ball mid air, people watching in intense concentration, and the coaches holding their hands up to their caps as if it the world depended on his swing. The ball took forever to get just a few feet in front of him. He looked over at his dad, hands in the air, his mouth wide open yelling his name like he was doing something wrong.
"Come on, Josh, wake up! Hit the ball and run, that's it."
***
Crack! The firework was a bright red.
He hit the ball successfully. Very successfully because he had hit a home run. He dropped the bat and did a slow run across all the bases. Josh felt relieved. The sparks were still going, red, white, blue, you name it, it's there.
He went back down the line, to the very end and high-fived all his friends. He looked back at the coaches, they were stunned.
Josh wasn't scared anymore. He still doesn't know why he was in the first place. Just the thought of screwing up was too much to deal with. Especially with his father, his sister, and most importantly himself.
As Josh sat down, he looked at his hand. It was throbbing with pain, but he didn't notice until he sat down. It appeared that he had a splinter. He'd get it out of his skin soon enough.
His stomach felt empty again and begged for food. He had some more sunflower seeds and felt a sting of excitement for Friday. Yeah, something will be missing. A grandiose thing will be missing but I'll have most of it, Josh thought.
***
"Nice job, Josh!" He was grabbing his items and as he bent down to grab his bags he heard a familiar voice. Josh spun around and saw his coach walk up to him. Both of them, actually.
"Thanks Coach Smith, Walker."
"Josh, we'd be proud to have you on the team this season. Would you like that?"
"Uh..." Josh didn't really know how to answer that question. If he hadn't of come, no, he would not like to be on the team so he can for a reason of course. "Yeah, I'd like that. Thank you, lemme go tell my father."
"Of course." Coach Walker said.
He couldn't believe it. He'd get on the team; Alice would be taken care of by their father without any worries. He ran over to him and told him everything. Every so often, Josh's father wasn't as grumpy as usual and Josh saw that he wasn't the slightest.
Alice was pulling on Josh's sweaty, bright red shirt, not knowing why everyone was so surprised at the news she didn't understand.
"What is it, Josh? What is it?!? Tell me!" Alice was staring up at him, wanting to know the amazing thing that happened.
"Well," Josh picked up Alice and swung her in his arms. "I made the baseball team, Alice." Josh knew that Alice wouldn't think of it as a big deal because she wasn't able to fully comprehend it, but it turns out that she acted happy because everyone else was.
"Yay, Josh!" Her cheering was making his ears scream, so he put Alice down.
They walked to the car, and Josh didn't have a thought in the world. He felt the slight pressure of his duffle bag against his shoulder. When the got to the car he put his stuff in the back of the car. He got to his side of the car but before getting in, he looked behind him.
The splash of red, orange, and yellow in the sky was nothing like he had seen before. He has seen a magnificent view before, but nothing like this.
Maybe my red firework has payed off, Josh thought.
"Josh?" His father finished putting squirmy Alice in her car seat and got ready to get in his own seat. The thing Josh payed attention to though was his father calling him by his nickname. It's always Joshua, Joshua and unbelievably, Joshua. "Let's go, we have to get you pizza. You want some, right?" He waved his hand to get in the car, but Josh wasn't done. Not yet at least.
He looked back at the sky and saw the nice bright moon come out behind the bushes of the trees. Josh thought and thought, then he realized. His father got his favorite snacks for baseball without even asking. Although Josh's father may be mean and grumpy sometimes, his love for Josh will never end.
Finally, he got in the car, heard the door click and enjoyed the slow movement of the car. Then, he looked over at his sister.
"Excited for Friday, Alice?"